[Ryokan]

Their TV show's opening sequence: "Earth--The Final Frontier!"

Or Earth: Looney Tunes.

 

[Ryokan]

 

[BobG55]

Patient : “I’d like to make an appointment to see the Dr.”
Dr’s assistant : “How about 10 tomorrow ?”
Patient : “No thanks, one appointment will suffice.”

 

[BobG55]

Dr. : “Congratulations, you are indeed pregnant and the other good news is that you may even have triplets.”
Woman : “That’s terrible news, that means I’ll be pregnant for 27 months !”

 

[Ryokan]

Dr. : “Congratulations, you are indeed pregnant and the other good news is that you may even have triplets.”
Woman : “That’s terrible news, that means I’ll be pregnant for 27 months !”

Reminds me when I was at work when young and on holiday a guys g/f asked if it was the same moon we had back home


(done some stupid things myself not picking on women in general)

 

[The Jester]

Doctor “ looking at this X-ray of a perfectly healthy body is impressive”
“ But now when looking at yours” …

 

[Ryokan]

Mr. Tipton: "Have you had any leadership experience?"

Ernest: "I had an ant farm once."

 

[Pharmaboy]

"I taught my dog to sit down."

"Siri does whatever I ask her to."

IMO a more proper interview cliche/question would be: "Do you any mindless subservience experience?"

 

[Ryokan]

"I taught my dog to sit down."

"Siri does whatever I ask her to."

IMO a more proper interview cliche/question would be: "Do you any mindless subservience experience?"

je ne n'est pas

 

[Ryokan]

 

[BobG55]

 

[BobG55]

 

[Ryokan]

 

[Ryokan]

One day a florist went to a barbers for a haircut. After the cut he asked how much he owed, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a thank you card and a dozen roses outside his door.

Later, a police officer comes in for a haircut and when he got his wallet out the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The police officer was happy and left. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a thank you card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.

Then a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay the barber again replied, 'I can not accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The MP was very happy and left the shop.

The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen MPs lined up waiting for a free haircut.

 

[The Jester]

Husband decides to give his wife some encouragement with her current diet, so for her birthday he bought her an expensive dress that was one size too small, and joked with her saying “I just can’t wait to see you in it” ..….
When his birthday came around his wife bought him a Coffin.